Tonight I discovered that my food processor has a shredding blade. And that it is fun to operate.
OK, technically I *rediscovered* this fact, as I shredded zucchini last summer with the food processor, but had since forgotten all about it.
Tonight I made pasta and decided to put the lone zucchini that’s been lurking in the crisper into the pot. And this is how I rediscovered the shredding gizmo: because the hand grater just did not look like something I felt like doing while it was 90 degrees F outside and 82 degrees F inside the kitchen and climbing (what with the boiling pasta pot going and all). So I shredded the zucchini in about 0.03 seconds, give or take a nanosecond, with the food processor. I don’t know how I forgot about this amazing little feature. With a flick of the wrist I had practically a mountain of beautifully shredded zucchini.
But it’s hard to hide an entire mountain of shredded zucchini, even when you cover it with pasta sauce and mix in some ground pork, when you’re feeding people who are naturally suspicious of green foods. So I just put a third of it in the pasta sauce. And then I thought, what am I going to do with all this zucchini? But nothing came to mind, so I put it in a clean cereal bowl and proceeded to clean out the food processor.
As I gingerly washed the shiny metal shredding blade, it occurred to me that our brief encounter had left me feeling strangely unfulfilled. I wanted to explore those symmetrical, glinty cutting blades further. I suddenly yearned to cram hunks of raw produce into the plastic feed tube and watch that disc of dessication turn them into mushy matchsticks in split seconds. Frantically, I rummaged through the fridge for something to shred. But there was nothing. Plums? Bad idea. Boiled eggs? Even worse. What did we have on hand that absolutely needed shredded?
And then I remembered the potatoes that came in our CSA box last week (which no one knows about, except me and L, since I haven’t blogged them yet… whoops). And I remembered some other potatoes that were in the potato bin and probably getting ready to sprout. And since I was remembering all of these potatoes and realizing that I have never shredded a potato with the food processor before, it seemed quite obvious what needed done. And in practically the amount of time it takes you to say “potato pancake”, I had shredded about three pounds of potatoes. So now I had a potato mountain, with some shredded zucchini foothills.
So then I found three onions and shredded them, along with half a brick of pepper jack cheese and some parmesan. And then I took off the shredder blade and put in the regular old metal blade, and made some bread crumbs with it. And I put all of this stuff into a casserole dish and baked it until it was a crunchy creamy gooey cheesy potatoey casserole of things entirely made with the food processor.
And now I’m feeling quite proud of myself for having (a) used up a bunch of food things lying around that might have otherwise gone to waste; (b) rediscovered the joys of small kitchen electrics inherited from one’s parents; (c) made something relatively healthy and tasty to boot; and (d) found something totally pointless to blog about after having blogged about practically nothing at all for so long.